So, I've been working on a cocktail called "grounds for divorce". From Not So Swedish, that is. I've not had the time or commitment that a loving wife must provide to sustain a marriage, and a group of my Not So Swedish lover's Definitely Not Swedish friends began to spread many rumours regarding my private, extracurricular activities. As this war between us has steadily grown, the children have been neglected for weeks and months. I was quite ready to sign the papers; the pen was in my hand, set upon the dotted line, when a bedraggled girl in last season's Dior stumbled over her McQueen armadillo heels towards my soon-to-be ex-lover, and cried: "Please, sir, I want some more!"
In that moment, I realized that a divorce would be selfish. More to the point, it wouldn't have been Swedish at all. It wouldn't even be not so Swedish (i.e., under the pretense or illusion of being Swedish, but not actually Swedish, or, variably, Swedish, but pretending to not be Swedish). It would be so completely not Swedish that I could not have bourne the dishonour. So here you find me, your seldom seen, Not So Swedish blogger, returning to her Not So Swedish ways. However, as with any marital reconciliation, changes must be made so that all are satisfied. So what is to be done?
As some of you seem to have noticed, there is a new member of the Not So Swedish blog. Nat Blomqvist (who I assure you is oh so Swedish [i.e., definitely Swedish, not pretending; or pretending, but totally doing so in a totally believable way]: I evidence her Caroline Brasch Nielsen blog), will be teaming up with yours truly on a project of hopefully epic proportions. Said project is yet to be revealed, nor will it be, until such a time when it is completed. I will however, give out periodic clues as to what is in the works, and I am of course, always in the market for contributors. So until then, I suppose you will have to wait with baited breath.
I don't know how excited you are/will be about this Project, and I don't doubt that there are still those that are more interested in my suspected connections with some of the more Swedishly-inclined members of the world's population than the endeavours of Ford & Blomqvist (& Co.). To the first group... I don't know what to tell you, other than that Haute Couture starts in Paris today, so you can be excited about that instead. To the latter, I don't know how else I can convince you that I am only as Swedish as you believe I am. Blomqvist is Swedish for sure, but I am most certainly of the Not So Swedish variety. Perhaps we will explore my Not So Swedish-ness in The Project. But I can make no promises that you will be satisfied.
Lastly, to the girl in last season's Dior and McQueen armadillo heels (and her many friends, for she was not alone): I would like to thank you for your support. It was very Swedish of you all, and I greatly appreciate it. It is down to you that I have forgone the grounds for divorce that once seemed so imminent. I would also thank Ms. Erika Berger for being such an inspiration to this blogger. I am (and remain) your ever avid fan.
To all of you, this seldom seen kid raises her glass.
Peace, love, and floating,
Gill Ford
